salt lake city
Once obligations of life are shared with a partner it is inevitable that differences in preferences, values and sensibilities will naturally arise and create conflict. Responding with integrity in the face of a loved one’s heightened emotion, or "authenticity in the face of duress," is universally challenging. Childhood and young adulthood have taught us to manage discomfort and anxiety in ways both useful and not so useful. Couples therapy is an opportunity to learn about yourself in the presence of your partner to become the most passionate, fully realized, least burdened and least resentful partner you can be.
I'm particularly interested in the impact of dropping defensiveness and moving into vulnerability. We are taught to be strong and to be right, and to a certain extent, this stance gets reinforced by external markers of success. But being strong and right threaten connection. My work is driven by a desire to understand what leads to defensive positions in attachments and how best to dismantle them so that couples can enjoy the sense of belonging they know, at a deep level, is possible.
My specialties include helping couples heal after infidelity, to diffuse physiological arousal (flooding), and manage gridlocked issues or entrenched patterns that exasperate and distress you.
First, call or email so that I can answer any questions you have and we can then schedule. I will send you a welcome letter which will provide a link to a video on Making Relationships Work, a film on Dr. John Gottman’s relationship research. I will also send you an assessment to complete before we meet. If we decide to work together, I will ask you to read my Couples Agreement and bring it in with both your signatures. This document explains my fees, cancellation policy, insurance matters and ground rules for therapy.
I am not on any insurance panels any longer and my practice is fee-for-service, with cost set at $170/hour.For more information about the methods I use, please take a look at www.gottman.com and at https://iceeft.com/. I also work with individuals and have training in EMDR: www.emdr.com.